Can’t we all get along?

Hullo & Welcome back to the Human Resource Corner! I haven’t written anything in this tab since July 😦 While cleaning out a pile of papers today, I found some training documents from the companies I worked at over the years. It made me do a quick mental compare & contrast as to why there are so many workplace challenges – not limited to my current location. The conclusions may hit home for you too (a bit–maybe).

photo-1568148800053-1e3b87e6c7b6
Photo by Luis Rocha on Unsplash

In retrospect, I think I was lucky to have worked in such a wide cross-section of organizations, industries and fields on the way to ‘finding myself’ and my true passion and purpose in life which is ever-evolving for most people.

Now that I’ve taken a step back from the 9-5 rat-race to devote all my energies to my writing – and subsequently speaking from the vantage point of the two fields where I spent most of my time, I realize working in those fields were more critical to getting to the root of the breakdowns in communication and staffing than I initially thought.

The two fields I speak of are Marketing & Corporate Communications and Human ResourcesTwo extreme fields that require two totally different personality types and skill-sets. So much so, that if you try merging the two you may find yourself being misunderstood by people whose job is not to know the nitty gritty of yours and what happens behind the scenes.

I don’t think there’s any way, anyone can humanly please EVERY-body on any given day. So if you don’t learn to cope and be happy as best you can with the circumstances and opportunities you’ve been granted at any point in time, you might just end up losing your sense of self and what’s important to you.

This simple joyful act (even the moments when you’re not feeling 100% and may have to push through and fake it a littleopens up more abundance than you can ever imagine. It certainly beats being a sourpuss winer (complainer) that nobody wants to be close to.

Ingratitude breeds discontent – even if you think there’s nothing to be happy about (or shout about), you’d be surprised by the things other people have to live with or without, that you may (still) have. When I need a little reality check and pinch of perspective, I put on the television, talk with someone else or read a book. Even comedy brings you full circle to the direction of true north (with the exception of insensitive-slap-stick comedy).

The things we take for granted then comes into clear view giving a greater appreciation for the people and things we have in our life in this moment. It then multiplies in different ways – grace, tolerance, patience and a healthy dose of laughter and joy that emanates from fully soaking in the great and small miracles of life.

The same can be said for almost every sphere of life – family, relationships and every single environment and physical space we find ourselves in. If you don’t know who you are inside & out, you’ll get lost in the (internal and external) ‘noise’, lose your grip on reality and your goals in life – which is not a nice state to live in.

Unless of course you enjoy (looping and) reliving every single thing that went wrong (and right) in your life thus far. You’ll basically be stuck in a time warp which I spoke about in The Cold Harsh Truths – Chapter 5 of my second book – How To Find Yourself & Claim What’s Yours.

Here are the BIG questions and observations emanating from those training materials from this standpoint (as a full-time writer)

photo-1562185022-c0a7889d7fbb
Photo by ROOM on Unsplash
  1. How come some people are internally motivated to assess a situation and go with the flow – almost on cue – intuitively knowing what needs to be done to resolve an issue and ACTUALLY doing it (consistently).

Yet others need to be prompted; told (or constantly reminded) what to do, constantly incentivized to do it, trained formally to get stuff done – even when the tools, resources, reminders, rewards & consequences are apparent and readily available?

2. How come some people gravitate toward certain types of jobs and industries, and others almost ‘gather’ in other spaces? There’s some overlap and most thrive where they willfully chose to be, but after a while there’s a breakdown in certain spaces because of personality clashes and lack of knowledge in certain areas.

Serendipity had its way again and it just so happened, I turned on the news to my favorite station now (gone are the days of T-h-e S-i-m-p-s-o-n-s!) and something interesting was said that I’d never forget (it was that pivotal to almost every human interaction!).

The author and adviser mentioned two world leaders who are so headstrong and equally intelligent, rendering it virtually impossible to challenge each other too much. Or to use his words – bait each other (successfully). One must (eventually) give way to the other, since there’s mutual respect and a strong sense of need to want to progress exponentially in unison and revolutionize the way things are done for the betterment of the masses with their unique skills and dynamic.

I think this assessment and bit of advice is so relevant to any group of people that want to have a peaceful and lasting interaction. Whether it’s friendship, a family living arrangement, people travelling together, a study group, a business, a department/wider team, or a (happy equally yoked) marriage

If the group or pair can’t genuinely and consistently respect and appreciate one another for who they are and what they bring to the dynamic of the group, I honestly believe the union is doomed to discord, mind games, working at cross purposes and eventual failure. 

When proper communication (listening & speech) begins to wane due to lack of understanding or commonalities necessary to give way to empathy, forgiveness, cordiality and progress, it’s time (in my opinion) to throw in the towel and call it a day.

photo-1568148800034-cbca694c5c12
photo credit – http://www.unsplash.com

Sometimes we don’t always end up in jobs and spaces we willfully chose; but circumstances make it necessary to show up, until we can traverse and settle in other territories. I don’t think anyone will choose to stay in one spot or location for an extended period of time if they had a choice (and are honest with themselves).

Human beings were made to explore, create, spread their wings and find practical uses for what they were born with deep inside to bring joy to themselves and others. 

Only when we push beyond that initial fear to explore what ‘spaces’ and people make us most happy and productive (aka a good fit) – emotionally, physically and mentally, will we find lasting peace and joy and share it unabashedly with others who also fit our mode of being.

 

If we don’t, we’ll settle for mediocre or crumby half-lived (bland) lives of pain, confusion, ill-health and malaise – not knowing what exactly we’re missing (if anything).

Feel free to follow or share this blog via the social media handles.

Until next time,

Carpe Diem! 

Carolyn x

www.carolyncorreia.co

hic-omega-consulting

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s