July Epiphanies!

Another week and July is getting underway (more than halfway mark!). Hope you are enjoying the warm (or cooler) temperatures depending on where you are. I have a funny story about the blogging schedule that I drafted which I’ll keep to myself for now 🙂

This blog will be a short one – a list of cool stuff I learnt this past year.

Photo by Essentialiving on Unsplash

I LEARNT that all we have is here and now and if we aren’t 100% fully present in what’s happening right now, our tomorrow will keep repeating itself until we learn the lessons our past is meant to teach us.

Or at least until the ones within our immediate circles understand where we are coming from so we can all move in the same direction to make things happen and bring the desired change we’d like to see materialize. I’m no philosophy buff, but I’m pretty sure Caesar was not a one-man operation (:

1. I learnt that if we are to get where we are intended to be in life, we must become really sure of who we are to naturally attract the people who totally get us the majority of time (friends, new family, clients etc) who speak the same language (aka our truths) and share similar points of view based on a shared past.

2. I also learnt that if people don’t share similar backgrounds, life and career experiences, it’s almost as though we are attempting to talk to the rain and expect it to respond in the way we’d like.

Even if we paint or draw them a picture or they had the superpower to read our minds, they would never truly and consistently understand, appreciate and respect us, where we are coming from and eventually we’d begin to drift further apart as we naturally gravitate toward people who do (almost without words). In other words, if they are not contributing to building us up, they would be adding to our slow demise.

3. I learnt that not everything you read or observe will ring true for you based on where you’re at in your life’s journey and goals. If it rings true to you at a later time, others may have already continued to evolve along their journey and paths would have (inevitably) diverged once a person is committed to growth.

4. I learnt that it’s wise to craft (aka journal) down to the tiniest detail what you want to attract – personally, professionally and spiritually. Since if you don’t know EXACTLY what you want, you’d always be hitting and missing on aspects of your life, eventually bringing discord and fleeting joy and peace to your life.

5. I learnt that progress is not one action or place or crowd. It’s a mode of being. It’s a way of life. It’s consistency, it’s self-knowledge. It’s an ethos that allows you to (almost) operate on auto-pilot – attracting more acutely who and what you need to your life each time you step up your game (aka evolve/grow/progress).

6. I learnt that ENERGY (in the form of thoughts etc) is real and it transcends. If you fail to attract and surround yourself with people on a similar journey, then your energy may not be able to overcome theirs and it may take a longer time to achieve your desired outcomes and goals (for the average citizen/human mind).

7. I learnt that based on these six lessons, you may never be able to successfully (and permanently) convince someone of your mode of being or operating, who hasn’t (yet) traversed similar life experiences [whether it’s career/work, family, grief, adversity, conflicts, identity (ethnicity, gender, spiritual beliefs etc)].  

Photo by Simon Infanger on Unsplash

You will be forever fighting a losing battle with them, yourself and your Creator and forfeiting your birthright (in my opinion) to live your best life’ which is fulfilling your unique purpose with your unique gifts/talents and enjoying everlasting joy, peace and love, eventually permeating to almost everyone you encounter.

It will be evident when you are on your way to achieving this (which is never finite and fixed for the above reasons)Your life will become comfortable – emotionally (joyous, peaceful, worry-free, contributing meaningfully to society), financially (stable – with needs met and extras for a rainy day or [occasional] ‘luxuries’) and physically (health, discipline/control, resilience, positive body image, living space, safety, security).

I often hear one common factor from people who have achieved most on this list: It comes with time (and life experiences), but the ability to consistently control your mind  can deflect most negative things and attract positive to your life. This is a practiced art we all continue to learn as we navigate our individual experiences and it supersedes all traditional forms of religion, education, physical activity or technology.

I would like to believe that most people want to be happy and achieve success in all areas of their life: a job they love, a place/s they love to work at, clients they love to do work for, people in their life they have stuff in common with and love to communicate with, and a home they love and look forward to returning daily.

Of course life is not absolute, so I would say 9 out 10 times on any given day this should hold true for you. I’m sure these two pictures melt your heart. If it doesn’t at this point in time, well – we may need to look at it with fresh lenses. They may just be actors for this particular photoshoot, but good vibes transcends beyond time and space/surface. Most times when it’s mutual, it can’t be completely ignored for an extended period of time.

Joy and love can’t be turned off like a light switch only when it’s convenient. They are permanent staples of who we are — regardless of the circumstance.

Apart from this, when things don’t work out the way in which we’d like; or there’s some obstacle or set-back preventing us from getting exactly what we want in the timing or the way we’d like, it often happens for a purpose. A normal occurrence for a lot of people I know and what remains true is this…

The set-back in the form of distance or adversity often reveals certain foibles (character flaws) or situations for who/what they really are – which may not be consistent with our value system or life goals required for our emotional equilibrium. For example: missing out on a mortgage, a job loss, pay cut or a break-up.

Trust the natural flow of life and turn of events. It can in fact be saving us from years of pain, revealing important lessons or unearthing newfound abilities to better prepare us for what’s to come. Whether it’s another job, transformation of a hobby into income, a better deal on another mortgage, migration to a new country or being led to a more compatible life partner. While none of these may be perfect, a foreseeable compromise may be possible to make us happier than we could have ever dreamt/read or seen in our favorite fairytale or movie.

At the end of each day and beginning of each new one, it’s up to us to reconcile the meaning and value of every single thing and person in our lives and take what we’d like from any situation (or person) we view as ‘happy or successful’ based on our emotional maturity levels and life experiences at any point in time.

In this way; we’d be consciously doing an inventory and raising our standards, while practicing gratitude, acceptance and focusing 100% on creating a happy successful life of our own. As the saying goes: ‘Age brings wisdom.’ My annual round-up is coming.

Carpe Diem!

Carolyn x

Birthdays past! 2012. A gift from my school friend in Hong Kong 😉 (-:


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